Actress Lindsay Duncan reveals she made sure her mother, who had dementia, ‘went peacefully’ by deciding against her having surgery at the end of her life
Published: 13:55, 4 January 2024 | Updated: 13:56, 4 January 2024
Actress Lindsay Duncan has opened up about making the difficult choice for her mother – who suffered with dementia – not to undergo surgery at the end of her life so that she could ‘go peacefully’.
Speaking on BBC[2] Woman’s Hour, the star, 73, also revealed that she hopes her family would do the same for her.
In a snippet of the interview shared on the programme’s Instagram[3], Lindsay told Emma Barnett[4] that she was ‘very close’ with her mother and ‘knew her better than anyone else’.
‘She had physiological problems and in order to investigate what was wrong with her, it would have involved surgery,’ the actress explained.
‘And I feel so, so lucky that as the person… who loved her more than anyone else in the world I made a decision that I didn’t want her to have that surgery.
Lindsay told Emma Barnett that she was ‘very close’ with her mother and ‘knew her better than anyone else’
‘What was the point in a demented woman having an anaesthetic and trying to come round from that?’
Lindsay also said that her mother had ‘lived the best life that she could’ – but had been deteriorating as a result of her being sick.
‘I knew that shed disappeared, basically and I felt absolutely sure that I could make that decision,’ she added.
‘I’d had doctors asking me from my knowledge of her: “was she in pain, you know, what was she like?”
‘And I could say: “Absolutely, I can see the minute differences in her” because I’d been through the whole thing with her.’
The actress was ‘grateful’ she could physically be there for her mother at the end of her life.
‘I’d been able to make sure she went peaceful and I could hold her hand and I could talk to her,’ Lindsay continued.
‘And I really, really hope that if I were in that situation that my family would do the same.’
Lindsay is starring a new drama called Truelove (pictured in the show), a darkly comic show about the implications of assisted dying
It was the first time that the star – who is also in a new Channel 4 show addressing storylines around dying with dignity – has spoken about her mother’s death publicly.
What is the current law on assisted dying in the UK?
In England, Wales and Northern Ireland helping someone to take their own life is punishable with up to 14 years in prison.
While no specific law exists in Scotland helping someone end their own life could lead to to prosecution for culpable homicide.
This, in theory, includes helping someone go through assisted dying overseas.
Charities say the current system leaves terminally ill Brits with little choice but to pay thousands to go overseas for their death.
They also warned that those who can’t afford to travel are deciding to take their lives at home, sometimes in pain, compared to a medically assisted death.
UK charities currently estimated that one Brit travels overseas for assisted dying every eight days.
There are currently proposals to change the law in some parts of the UK.
Last September in Scotland, Liberal Democrat MSP Liam McArthur lodged the final proposal to introduce a Member’s Bill which would legalise assisted dying for people who are terminally ill, though no date has been given yet for when this might be considered.
A public consultation on a Private Member’s Bill on assisted dying closed on the Isle of Man at the end of January.
A consultation on assisted dying proposals also took place in Jersey between October 2022 and January and publication of a consultation feedback report is expected in April.
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She was replying to a question about actress Rachael Stirling, whose mother recently made a call for assisted dying before her passing.
In England, Wales and Northern Ireland helping someone to take their own life is punishable with up to 14 years in prison.
While no specific law exists in Scotland helping someone end their own life could lead to to prosecution for culpable homicide.
Lindsay is starring a new drama called Truelove, a darkly comic show about the implications of assisted dying.
It starts with five old friends – including Lindsay, who took on the role of former police chief Phil – talking about death after the funeral of one of their gang.
As they drink they reminisce – and then decide to make a pact: if one of them asks for help to end their life early, they all agree they’ll do it.
It comes as veteran actress Susan Hampshire, who quit the stage and screen to care for her husband and elderly sisters, has called for an urgent review of assisted dying.
Branding the current laws cruel, she said the trauma of witnessing her loved ones’ wishes for a ‘dignified end’ being denied would never leave her.
Susan, 86 – best known for starring in BBC[5] drama The Forsyte Saga – said a democratic and civilised country ‘should surely be able to rethink the current law’.
She made the comments in a statement to the health and social care committee’s inquiry into assisted dying.
Fresh debate on the issue was sparked last month when Childline founder Dame Esther Rantzen[6], who has stage four lung cancer[7], revealed she had joined the Dignitas assisted dying clinic.
Triple Emmy[8] award winner Susan, who also starred in Monarch of the Glen, said the law is in need of ‘urgent reform’.
She added: ‘I have witnessed, hour by hour and minute by minute, my loved ones’ wishes for a dignified end being denied. That trauma will never leave me.’
‘In 2018, my sister, then 94, broke her hip and following complications came home with palliative care support. The carers were unable to relieve her suffering. ‘If only there was a pill to end it all,’ she said often, as she begged for help to end her pain.
She wanted ‘out’.
‘Her only course of action was to starve herself to death and she died many weeks later. Watching her deteriorate and suffer was truly unbearable.’ Two years later, she helped her other sister, then also aged 94, as she suffered ‘multiple illnesses resulting from rheumatoid arthritis’.
‘She was in terrible, constant, agony,’ Susan said. ‘I can still hear her tiny voice pleading with me to help her ‘skip this bit’.
‘It was horrific, not just for her but also for me, her children and grandchildren. No one wanted her to die, but she was dying.
It was cruel to deny her the dignity she begged for and so deserved.’